Response to the Daily Post Prompt: Flawed
What is your worst quality?
Emotions are powerful. They can fuel your motivation. They can help you connect with others. They can generate all sorts of good feelings.
However.
They can also drive you to want to hurt other people–to react and carry out spiteful actions, in order to hurt the other person for hurting you. In order to “get back” at them.
Cold shoulder. Because by refusing to be in that moment with you, I thought that you would feel regret and realize why it is that I am angry at you, and make amends on your own.
Storing up anger and pretending that everything is fine, until my breaking point. Angry words. Contemptuous glares. When I should have let it out as the small bursts they come in as, or remind myself that I blew the problem out of proportion.
Ignoring. Because I thought that by depriving someone of my care and attention, I could make them feel as neglected as I did… at that moment.
Many times, I have let anger get the best of me. But over time, I learn the true importance of communication, patience, and not letting my ego convince me that I’m ALWAYS right. Over time, I reflect on my emotions and ask myself, “Why is it that this specific situation/action/phrase bothers me so much?” It is when I find out, that the small thought telling me to be reasonable, gains confidence and a stronger voice.
I work to not let my turbulent emotions manifest into actions or words I’ll regret, but they are still a weak point of mine. It’ll be a long process, but I can already see the end.
One moment of hesitation when about to send an angry text,
at a time.
One moment of looking at the situation from the other person’s shoes,
at a time.
One moment of reflective quiet where I ask myself if my thoughts are reasonable, in place of angry quiet,
at a time.
One memory of the other person’s good points, which takes off the blinders generated from anger,
at a time.
One day, this will not be my greatest weakness. Then, I shall work on the next one. 🙂
musingsofamapletree 